Tag Archives: soul

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March 10, 2015

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DAY 290 Sober: Las Vegas

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DAY 290 Sober: Las Vegas

Hello Friends, today is day 290 sober. I just got back to Palm Springs from Las Vegas, Nevada. The home of sins, neon lights booze and gambling. Traveling is one of the joys of my life, seeing new things with clean eyes. Beyond grateful that I am able to have wonderful opportunities that allow me to travel, Every time I’m in Palm Springs CA its hard to leave and say goodbye to loved ones. I find myself not missing LA, maybe its just me being in the moment and taking in each day as if was my last.

My stepmother/ best friend joined me on this trip. We are both huge “The killers” fans and the lead singer of the band coming out with his second solo album. The show was at a venue called “Bunkhouse”. The first time I seen “The killers” was 10 years ago in Vegas. My stepmother was the age I am now. It feels really amazing to be here in a better state of mind, I did gamble a bit won a hundred bucks. The last time I was in Las Vegas was six years ago. At the time I was still drinking and in a bad place mentally. No purpose and floating through life without really living it. Don’t remember much about that experience but I know it involved me binge drinking. As a child I disliked the atmosphere but as I got older I learned to fall in love with the sin city.

Unfortunately a couple of hours before the venue opened we all got the news Brandon Flowers had to cancel the show due to illness. I traveled a long way with lack of sleep. I was so excited only to not see him. I can’t control life but I can choose to be devastated, hurt and angry or I can see the sliver lining. How blessed I am to be able to afford wonderful trips with my stepmother. Yes I was not able to see Brandon flowers but I was able to create amazing memories see friends back home, eat great food, laughing all the way and a little debauchery in gambling. Sliver linings are beautiful it brings me back to my soul and a place of gratefulness.

I’ll be heading back to Los Angeles in a few hrs. Back to work Tomorrow. Sober is the New Black.

God Poem

 

vegas bus

 

 

wonderful unkowns

 

 

 

 

This video of Brandon Flowers is perfection “only the young”. Hope you enjoy

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November 1, 2014

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DAY 161 SOBER: Loving me Whole

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DAY 161 SOBER: Loving me Whole

Hello Friends today is day 161 sober, It’s a beautiful day in Los Angeles. I needed some new optical glasses and headed over to little Tokyo, Warby Parker has some amazing glasses. I am now at my Favorite Coffee shop in Korea town. My goal this weekend is to write and spend sometime relaxing with my brother. I’ve been working ton of hours that allows little to no writing time. I am so grateful for the readers of Sober is the new black, This month the blog will be more active with my poetry, writing and starting some new aspects, That currently in the works. My book will be done in May and hopefully to print. Since I have gotten sober, I’ve had one craving about a month ago.

 The mind is so different this time sober because I shut down that craving quickly. It was a huge step in my recovery process in the past, I would dwell and suffer in that craving but I change my thought and reminded myself of step one. It vanished, Cravings are part of the recovery process and I use that experience as a test to see if my program is working. So far my program is working, it helped me get through it and no cravings since.

 

This week I was on instagram and found a photo of a monk and his brother, both so different. I love looking at people from a far or photos and finding a story. When I saw this photo it impacted me tremendously. People could read it as good or bad, I see it more as the monk accepting his brother whole, seeing him only in the light of love and not in his own opinion or ego. I want to start seeing people souls more as opposed to their life scars that lay on their skin. I don’t know their story or why they are the way they are. I am not here to judge but I am here to hold their hand while they weep. I am going to be 29 in a week and I want to start being kinder, letting go of mind funk that makes me feel lesser at times. I need to be kinder to myself.

 

I want people to see past my disorder, my chubby cheeks, the food I eat, past my old ways and see my soul, see the good in me. Yes my disorder hurt a lot of people caused a lot of tears but I am a changed person due to my recovery, Lesson learned and the wheels keep turning. The photo below is of a monk and  his brother, I hope today the readers suffer less and become fearless in the fight of sobriety. Sober is the new black.

 

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Sober is the New Black 

Stay connect with love, Adolfo Vasquez

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July 30, 2014

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DAY 68 Sober: Knowing my Triggers, Sober Hangover

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DAY 68 Sober: Knowing my Triggers

Hello friends, today is day 68 sober. I woke up happy as can be. I feel such a relief from yesterday post about my childhood. It was freeing and letting the words fall out from inside me out into the universe. Those words have been suffocating me for years. I am currently sitting on in a café in Koreatown listening to Amanda Palmer Ampersand. Music is such a powerful healing tool, it opens up my heart so I can cry those healing tears and some music fills my soul the strength for the day. Lately I’ve been swimming in music. Koreatown in Los Angeles is my favorite place to live. I currently live close to downtown LA but want to move back to this area. I have the next two days off so film; writing and sleep are on agenda. I opened the email sent from the Editor, it had feedback on my “untitled book”. It all made sense but I haven’t had time to finish all the corrections. My goal is to finish it these two days, so Coffee and more coffee will be my companion. Lately I’ve been feeling creative in my bed with the lights off like a love affair with my lab top. I tend sleep next to my MAC, It goes everywhere with me.

 

I need to be aware of my triggers when it comes to my Addiction that is called Alcoholism. I need to go back and see what went wrong the last time I got sober, what was the triggers that brought me back to using. First, I did not have a program to help me over come the body disorder the craving part. Second I did not have a program to help me with the mental part of the disorder. I didn’t have the right mental tools.  My triggers were boredom, when I was bored I drank. Also loneliness was a trigger. When I  felt alone I drank. Now I am alone now and I don’t have cravings at all, instead I crave life, being kind, helping others when I can, writing, and film. I am never am bored, I don’t let myself, and I always have my day plan out so I can stay busy. I use to just wonder through life without long term goals always focusing on instant gratification never trying to work towards long-term gratification that is more rewarding. I was lazy and content with not putting work into myself. Now I try to limit my instant gratification, before if I wanted something I got it without looking at my checkbook. I do allow healthy mind, body and soul instant gratifications but a limit. Now I say no to myself most of the time because I need to save for my long-term goals or gratifications. I won’t let boredom inn. The number one reason for me relapsing was letting the mental disorder convince me that I am not an addict. I am now in control of my thoughts so my mental disorder has no power over my self awareness and higher power and I fully surrender to my higher power that I understand it to be.

 

I also allow myself to feel sad emotions. I don’t hold it in, letting it out in my tears. I also try and live in the moment all the time, not letting my mind control my life anymore and let my soul lead. Thoughts and mind are amazing if I use it for positively to help me but when I use it to be self -abusive like comparing myself to others and jealous brings me closer to my Addiction. Sober is the New Black.

I am grateful for life, for falling in love with myself and for my higher power.

 

The greatest love of all Whitney Houston is prefect. The greatest love of all is within me.

 

Stay connect with love, Adolfo

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July 14, 2014

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DAY 52 SOBER: MAYA ANGELOU, Sober Hangover

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DAY 52 SOBER: MAYA ANGELOU

Hello friends today is coming to an end of day 52 sober. Today has been such an amazing day. I have a great nap and I am feeling well rested. Maya Angelou is perfection to me, Her poems resonate with my soul. Every word, speaks to me. Its does not matter where you are from or the story you have lived, We are connected.  Her Inspiring words carry me through out my day among other influences. If i am ever feeling a bit blue or just need a pick me up for my soul, I RISE From Maya Angelou helps me go deep and find my inner smile, my inner tiger, my inner Adolfo. I am so grateful for her life and her words. Sober is the New Black has been such an amazing journey so far. I hope you guys enjoy this video below. Maya Angelou I rise.

 

 

Stay connect with love, Adolfo

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July 11, 2014

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DAY 49 SOBER: Falling in love with myself, Sober Hangover

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DAY 49 SOBER: Falling in love with myself

Hello Friends today is day 49 sober. Yesterday I had a blast hanging out with my friend Mel, We ate dinner and shopped, its feel great to have supportive friends. She is pretty awesome.  I also got a new hairdo.  Yesterday I did not write at all except my post earlier in the day. That was a first in a while so today I plan on a 5hr writing session after a 5hr nap. Waking up at 340AM everyday is starting to affect me, I am short with people, not fully alert, sleeping most of my day, so I need to change my work schedule. Its nice getting off early but I am so tired. I feel like I do not have a normal life. I feel like even 3:40am is early  for a morning person.  Talking to the boss man today! 

 

This weekend I’ll be hanging out with a friend I have not seen since I got sober. She was the first friend I met when I moved out here.  She knows everything about me, never judge me; She listens, and is supportive.  She was my drinking buddy on occasion but booze is no longer in my life. I don’t mind if she drinks around me. Being around people who drink doesn’t affect me at all because I do not want to drink but if I start having a craving for booze, I all have to leave the situation, pray and look inward.  The not wanting to drink does not mean I am free of it, I am sure there are going to be moments of cravings but I just have to push through and not give in to that voice in my mind called Alcohol-ISM (inside self  & Mind). We are planning a slumber party with food and movies! I kind of want to also do a pool day and maybe go dancing! I love to dance!

 

My goal this weekend is to finish up my childhood long read and also make a video blog! Two months is around the corner and I can’t believe the progress I have made in my recovery. I am more myself and it’s a great feeling getting to know me. And living in the moment. Staying focus on my sobriety is the Key to my door of success in love, life, career and self-improvement. As the days pass I am falling in love with every part of myself, something I never had the awareness or the capacity to do.  I did not know how.  My higher power is inside me, it’s part of me so I have to give myself the same love and respect I give my higher power.  I understand that I am a soul, spirit having a human Experience. The soul is very simple it’s the human shell that makes life complicated.

 

 

Stay connect with love, Adolfo