Day 49 Sober: Fridays with Oprah Winfrey

Hello friends coming to my end of 49 days sober. My previous Fridays used to consist of drunken blurs surrounded by others but now I find myself  alone often , soul searching, writing, reading, and trying to figure out my issues. Fridays are my peace days. The chaos that comes with the week comes to an end and I am now well rested, ready for the weekend. Fridays are my time to reflect on how I can improve my awareness of my Body and mental disorder called Alcoholism for the following week. Sober is the New Black has been a great tool . I learned that if I don’t get enough sleep I could become very unhappy at work! I really need to get sleep or learn how to coupe with not getting enough sleep. Learning how to coupe with tried-ness without the booze is a bit hard but I am glad I am aware enough to fix it. 

Fridays will now be my soul-searching days to guide me to a sober weekend ahead! Instill some courage, joy, and self-awareness is really fulfilling. The drunken blackouts, chaos, self abusive, not dealing with my issues, not dealing with feelings, hurting loved ones, vomiting my booze only to make room for more, eating nothing so I can get a quick buzz and not eating to stay drunk, waking up with body pain and mental pain only to do it all over again Saturday is not soul fulfilling anymore. I am starting to see the beauty in a quite night, I don’t want to sound like an introvert prude that doesn’t enjoy being around people but I need these Fridays to reflect so I can be a fun loving person dancing away with others in a night club. I do enjoy a great dance!

Sobriety is bringing me an understanding of what validation means in my life . I love hearing shares. To understand them without opinions or judgments. To really connect with their words and feelings. Show compassion and empathy without a single thought of deposition. I am not my brothers’ keeper; I am brother so when he suffers I suffer. I got a tattoo a couple years ago subconsciously not fully understanding the meaning but now I get it! Now I fully connect with it. Its in a shape of a heart and it reads “I am you, you are me we are one” For me I see it as we both are separate identities but when you take away all are individual beauty that’s make us all amazing, I feel we find a common thread that connects each other souls. I want to live in that space always!

 

Oprah shows on her own network have been such a help in giving me advice and tools to implement in my life, I know people have their on views on her but I enjoy adding spiritual stuff to my life also with my program, It works for me and keeps me sober! And staying sober has to be me my number love in my life. The rest will fellow!

 

Here is a video that helps me with understanding how to disconnect from my past story my mind tells me about in my present!

 

Stay connect with love, Adolfo

 

DAY 49 SOBER: Falling in love with myself

Hello Friends today is day 49 sober. Yesterday I had a blast hanging out with my friend Mel, We ate dinner and shopped, its feel great to have supportive friends. She is pretty awesome.  I also got a new hairdo.  Yesterday I did not write at all except my post earlier in the day. That was a first in a while so today I plan on a 5hr writing session after a 5hr nap. Waking up at 340AM everyday is starting to affect me, I am short with people, not fully alert, sleeping most of my day, so I need to change my work schedule. Its nice getting off early but I am so tired. I feel like I do not have a normal life. I feel like even 3:40am is early  for a morning person.  Talking to the boss man today! 

 

This weekend I’ll be hanging out with a friend I have not seen since I got sober. She was the first friend I met when I moved out here.  She knows everything about me, never judge me; She listens, and is supportive.  She was my drinking buddy on occasion but booze is no longer in my life. I don’t mind if she drinks around me. Being around people who drink doesn’t affect me at all because I do not want to drink but if I start having a craving for booze, I all have to leave the situation, pray and look inward.  The not wanting to drink does not mean I am free of it, I am sure there are going to be moments of cravings but I just have to push through and not give in to that voice in my mind called Alcohol-ISM (inside self  & Mind). We are planning a slumber party with food and movies! I kind of want to also do a pool day and maybe go dancing! I love to dance!

 

My goal this weekend is to finish up my childhood long read and also make a video blog! Two months is around the corner and I can’t believe the progress I have made in my recovery. I am more myself and it’s a great feeling getting to know me. And living in the moment. Staying focus on my sobriety is the Key to my door of success in love, life, career and self-improvement. As the days pass I am falling in love with every part of myself, something I never had the awareness or the capacity to do.  I did not know how.  My higher power is inside me, it’s part of me so I have to give myself the same love and respect I give my higher power.  I understand that I am a soul, spirit having a human Experience. The soul is very simple it’s the human shell that makes life complicated.

 

 

Stay connect with love, Adolfo