DAY 96 Sober: The best I can Be

Hello friends today is day 96 sober, it’s been a great day so far. I feel like I need more reading in my life, going to look for newly sober book. With every day that passes my love for myself gets stronger and what used to hurt me or anger me, no longer does. The Only thing that matters is how I feel about myself, I need to constantly be working towards creating a better me, do what works best for me. In the past I got sober for all the wrong reason, hence my relapse.

 

 I celebrate being sober everyday like a birthday even if I am sad because I am coping with life. That’s amazing me dealing with life, I used to run from issues now I cut right true them. Getting to know myself is a great feeling, knowing what I want, what I need to work on, Instead of trying to be perfect, I am learning how to become more human. I don’t believe in mistakes I feel like the universe knows exactly what I need to experience so I can learn and grow. Lesson may not be seen right away but they will blossom at some point. Today living in a state of gratefulness is keeping me sober and being aware of the mental disorder, that voice that is losing its power as I write these words down.

 

 Life seems very simple in sobriety not that chaos of drunken stumbles. Everything is flowing like that river. Just be the best I can be and the universe will work the rest. My brother Andrew will be moving out to LA sometime next week or so, very excited to have my brother out here, so much opportunity out here for him. Are home town is a great place to retire but not for finding your passion. I’ll never go back, it just memory filled. Not the ones I’d like to remember. People that want to see me make an effort I am grateful for that, those are the ones that have always made an effort as I do as well. Change is great opportunity whether change is wanted or not. My brother moving out here won’t affect my goals or my sobriety, my mind is clear. There are rules already in place that he is aware of, no booze or drugs allowed in my home period. I hope this move can give my brother some growth and long terms goals, anything is possible in life, you just have to want it really bad and work towards it with a positive mindset. Sober is the New Black. I am grateful for books, family, friends, love and making connections with people.

 

Stay connect with Love, Adolfo Vasquez

Fitz and the Trantrums Moneygrabber is dedicated to the booze. Don’t come back you are no longer welcome in this home, you already blinded me in the past

 

 

DAY 95 Sober: Whatever will be will be

Hello friends, today is day 95 sober, yesterday I was feeling a bit sick but it’s from tiredness. I started working two jobs, writing and having a life is possible but it can be tiresome but sobriety is number one. Today I am feeling great! I went and got a haircut. I’ve been in bars and clubs, around friends and family who drink. Old places and new places still no need or want for that whiskey kiss. My mind loves this sober state; it was malnourish for so long. I now have nightmares of one day hanging out with friends and I accidently pick up their soda instead of mine and there is booze in it. That’s how focus I am in not ever drinking. Drinking is now a Nightmare. It feels good be coherent and not living in the past. I am learning to be focus yet not so hard and tense to allow greatness to flow out.

 

 

It no longer crosses my mind when I am around it, I forget people are drinking around me, it’s like the booze loss it power when I became aware of mind disorder. I am to focus on connection with people over what they are drinking. I am kind of the same me just a better version. I still love late night food runs, dancing, even making out but just sober. I am learning not everything physical around me has to change just my mind has to change. I see things differently now. I am also finding new love in things I never done before. New fun if you can call it; Like poetry, long walks and basketball. I don’t miss my old life anymore; I do miss the people but not my state of mind I was in. My body is looking great too. Overall I am exactly were I need to be. I no longer live in what if I would have done that differently. I accept the things I cannot change, change the things I can, and create the wisdom to now the difference. I just want to be better than I was yesterday and so on. Sober is the New Black

 

Stay connect with love Adolfo Vasquez

Doris Day whatever will be will be is perfect for this post, Que Sera Sera

 

 

 

Day 94 sober: Under the Weather

Hello friends today is day 94 sober. Today has been a good day, about two hours ago I started feeling sick, i had a headache and i caught my eyes rolling in back of my head when i was standing.. It might be because of tiredness. Ive been pushing myself a bit lately. I also have some cold sweats, so i am now in bed calling it a night. Sober is the New Black

Stay connect with love, Adolfo Vasquez

DAY 93 Sober: A Sober Night out

Hello friends today is day 93 sober, it’s been such a busy week . I started transitioning into my seasonal job, I will still be working at the non profit. I’ve been annoyed with a new boss from the nonprofit. He is really aggressive in making a name for himself which I understand new boss usually do. He just goes about it in a rude way. I notice about myself if people are rude then my patience disappear in being nice with them. I can’t let others unhappiness affect mine. People should be nice to one another period. It can be hard if your are having a bad day but its possible. I’m grateful my mind is clear enough to see what I need to work on. I also wonder how much of it is just being a human, and not so much the addiction. Humans feel annoyed. I sometime wonder if me feeling these feelings will worry my family. I should be able to feel these things and it doesn’t mean I will drink. I know with every cell I wont.

 

I love that I am aware of the things I need to change; I want to be the best I can be in every moment. I’ve been writing a lot more. Which is great, every time I write a poem, its like I am giving birth. I get emotional when it’s done. Today my goal is to only write. At least 20 poems. I found this Café that is a perfect place. I get inspired being outdoors.

 

 

Yesterday after the working meeting I was going to go write but some friends wanted to go hangout, I was going to say no and continue to be a hermit but I knew I needed to get out more. I am so glad I did, we were out till 3 am. Sober fun is pretty amazing, waking up with your body refresh without any hangover, no pain and remembering the night. My friends did drink and I had no cravings. We went for drinks after the meeting I had a coffee, then after we hit up a bowling alley. I love to bowl and pretty good. The alley had everything from an arcade to pool tables. I had such a blast, it made me realize writing is important but so is having a social life. With that said I do enjoy being alone. Sober is such a wonderful state a mind. I don’t just want to be sober from booze but also sober from ego, past, guilt, sober from anything that is preventing me from reaching my full potential. Sober is the New Black. I am grateful life, friends, sober fun, love, and writing.

 

Iggy Azalea work is a great song, Its exactly  what I am doing, I am working no me. 

 

 

 

 

Stay connect with love, Adolfo