DAY 56 Sober: Homeward bound

Hello friends Today is day 56 sober, I woke up feeling really blessed. Today I travel back home to palm springs for the weekend. I always enjoy heading back, seeing family, seeing great friends, and of course eating all the yummy food I miss.  Going back Sober means a lot to me, in the past when I went home my mindset wasn’t clear, I had angry built up for my birth parents, I was drunk most of the time, I did not enjoy the moments. I probably wont see my birth parents but I do love them and wish them well. This trip will be filled with lots of love, food, laughter, tons of relatives, and a trip to a local Gay club. I love to dance and I need to start doing more stuff I love to do and less stuff I don’t like doing, life is to short. Maybe I can find a make out buddy but I won’t be holding my breath. 

My old night life in palm springs was always chaos before I would head out I knew that something would happen that will either lead to a drunken argument, fight, losing my ride home, arrest, getting kicked out of the club or bar, tying to score, tons of vomit and some crazy fling that was pretty horrible, I really had no respect for my body at all. I started going to a popular club around 15 yrs. old since then I’ve been kicked out tons of time.  I still can’t believe I made it out of Palm Springs alive and that I am in the space that I am in right now. Dancing is fun but I also want to sit a coffee shop and write, when I lived in the desert my mindset was in a different place so to do what I love back home would be a nice change. I never would write back home, I know my creative inspiration would blossom.

I enjoy somewhat of a routine in my life and when I don’t have it I get a bit sad, I feel like it stems from having such an unstable childhood and no really security, I so need that now but I need to change that it’s not healthy I am no longer in that environment.  I need to focus on the moments and say my grateful prayer each morning. It’s usually in the shower, cleanse from the day before. A refreshing new start. I give up every negative thought that bother me the day before, I ask my high power turn me upside down shake out all the negative thoughts, anger, hurt, pain, past, ego, fear, people criticism and put in happy thoughts, courage, compassion, love, joy, laughter, accepting of others, creativity, awareness and stillness. I used to look outward for those things but those are all created from within, I am the co-creator with the ultimate creator. Sober is the New Black

I am grateful for life, being sober, for family and for my aunt Angie for picking me up!

The killers are one of my favorite band of all time. The killers carry me home is the perfect road trip

Stay connect with love, Adolfo

DAY 10 Sober: June Bloom, Planting Soul Seeds

Hello, Today is day 10 sober! So excited to make it to the double digits. June for me is going to be filled with mindfulness, Positive Reinforcement and Positive Actions. I wont allow any June Gloom in my life. Last night was my first night in my new Apartment it was pretty amazing knowing i did it all myself. no help. Yesterday move was a stressful day, but my Alcoholic disorder did not come out and infect my mind with negative thoughts. I did get a bit annoyed but i feel like that’s  natural and i did not react in a negative way.

 

I learn that life is going to get hard at some point and the only thing you can control is your reaction.  My Alcoholism is a disorder i have to live with for the rest of my life, it took me a long time to come to terms with that idea. June will be a month of me planting seeds in my soul. The seeds are Long term goals, joy, forgiveness, wellness,peace, truth sobriety, hope but i have to get all the weeds out. The past, Negative thoughts, Loneliness, Jealous, ego, comparison, judgement. I cant just leave the seeds i have to water and feed the seeds with patience, love, positive thoughts, laughter, empathy, self respect, and most important Sobriety. 

June will be amazing and filled with purpose.  below is a video i made last night before i left my old apartment.. Goodbye may Hello june bloom!

Thank you for all the support!

Stay connect with love, Adolfo