DAY 76 Sober: A Power of A Shower

Hello friends, today is 76 sober. My work called me last night and they needed me to come in today. So I am here and feeling positive. I think it important for me to have a place where I can do a daily reflection from the day before. That usually happens in the morning or afternoon before I head out for the day. Somewhere where I can meet with my inner divine and ask it to guide me. My place is the shower, It’s kind of symbolic having yesterdays dust or filth wash away so my inner me can shine. Clean from the worries, the Stress, the wants, the needs. My prayer is for all the stuff to wash away and to instill greatness or whatever was lacking from the day before because I am not perfect but I want to always be working towards feeling whole inside. When I get sad or feeling stress or worried my shower is my safe place. Were I can cry or even scream if I need to. It was the place where I am always alone. Where it’s just my mind and me. I also get a lot of ideas in the shower. When I would get anxiety a nice shower would easy my nerves or if I was feeling sick a nice hot bath would sooth it.

 

The Shower growing up was so fun. My imagination would go wild. I would spend hours to the point my parents would pound on the door to get me out. I would use it as a slip and slide, a sea of possibility. As I got older the shower sometimes used for Adult fun. One of the greatest moments of my life happened in the shower. I was partying really hard the night before, I don’t think I ever did that much blow in one night and whiskey, I did so much I spun out. I got in the shower and had a horrible withdrawal attack.  My heart was pounding out of my chest, I had to go to the hospital. Ever since that day my anxiety has magnified. That incident saved my life and opened my eyes to how dangerous Cocaine is. After that incident I tried it a few times but I stopped soon after.

In a few ill be heading to a coffee shop close by so I can get most of my poems finish. They are coming along. All of them are different and its own living breathing thing. I will eventually turn them into a book. I am grateful for Sober is the New Black, for a positive mind, for the love that’s being created within, and my Showers

 

Beyonce XO  Video is how I feel at the moment. I am Madly in love with myself and so inspired with life, Even with the lights out. In the darkest night I search through the crowd and I find my inner divine.

 

 

 

Stay connect with love, Adolfo

 

 

 

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DAY 47 Sober: Healthy Crying

Hello friend’s day 47 sober has arrived and I am feeling positive! Today I start a workout routine; I am pretty active now days but I don’t have a solid routine. I want a whole mind body and soul shift. AA is a program for my recovery form Alcohol-ism (Inside Self  & Mind) and I have started a life program which involves Reading and listening to spiritual teachers. Looking inward so I can find out what caused my issues, if I don’t find the cause (root) of my issues than it would surface in another areas of my life. Getting in touch with my emotions and learning how to feel and endure pain. Overcoming my fears and letting go. Getting to know my higher power and loving myself! 

 

Everything has changed in my life since I got sober, even the way I cry. Its going to be hard to explain but ill try my best. When I get sad a thought surfaces that cause the feeling of sadness than the thought leaves with the sadness and once that leaves my body just starts crying without me blinking or trying or thinking it just starts. It only last for a few moments and when it ends. I am happy again without those past feelings of sadness. My body is meant to grieve and move on. Before I would harper on the sadness causing pain while I cry and sitting with it, crying for hours. Now it just flows naturally without trying. It happened in public a few times I was kind of shocked the first time.  I did not try and stop the tears they eventually stop on their own.  Maybe Its because I am becoming self aware and its teaching me the right way to grieve. Crying is a great tool for me to relieve my mind and soul; it’s like a form of detoxing. I still have a long way to go but I know I am on the right path because I feel the universe presence at all times! I am grateful for this blog Sober is the New Black and for my progress so far!

 

Stay connect with love, Adolfo