DAY 55 Sober: Poem for Addicts who Suffer

LOVE YOU NEAR, LOVE YOU FROM A FAR

 

Don’t know you but I love you

Walked a different path but I stand beside you

Crying rain of pain but I will planet seeds of change

Soul low with shame lets rise all the same

Wrapped in a quilt of guilt, I will set flame to the blame

Suffering inside Gloom ill make room for bloom

Memorize by infected past I will sterilize till the last

Tattooed by Abusive hate I will love you like soul mate.

Pushed aside I will coincide.

Skin cracks from neglect I will connect and deflect

I am you.

You are me.

We are one.

WRITTEN BY ADOLFO VASQUEZ

This Tattoo i got years ago with out understanding the meaning until now.

This Tattoo i got years ago with out understanding the meaning until now.

This is a song from A film called once Called falling Slowly and its so powerful! one of my favorite films of all time. Sober is the New Black

Stay connect with love, Adolfo

DAY 55 Sober: Now and Then

Hello friends today is day 55 sober, 5 more days away from 2 months. I am so grateful Ive made it this far.  There are some key differences this time around getting sober. When I stop drinking in the past I wanted to just stop drinking that’s it, I believe I had the power to live the same life, hangout out in the same places,  just stop the drinking not work on the cause. I Did not fully accept I was an addict. I thought I could eventually portion control my booze.  I did not understand that everything negative in my life was caused by my drinking.  I was Ashamed and Embarrassed to speak up about my Addiction and wanted know one to know. I did not understand That Alcohol-ISM (Inside Self & Mind) is a disorder that acts out when you are not treating it with Alcohol. The disorder will convince you to lie, cheat, steal to get booze. I was unaware that the voice in my head wasn’t me it was the ISM. It sounded like me, knew what story to tell me to get me to a bar.  I also didn’t know how to surrender to my Higher Power, as I understood it to be. I did  not realize that the my addiction stems from my childhood, booze helped me cope with life.  I was an addict before i took my first drink. 

I am so grateful my eyes are clear and Not only do I understand those things mention, I truly feel it in my bones and every cell of my body. Now the smell and sight of Alcohol makes me nauseous. Gives me a bitter taste of vomit and there is know longer an emotional attachment. I know ill never drink or crave booze but since I am not treating the ISM disorder (Inside self & Mind) it can resurface in my life in other ways, so I have to watch my mind, my feelings, and my thoughts.  Everything about my life has to change, if I used to walk on the right side of the street I now walk on the left side. 

This weekend I’ll be heading back home to Palm Springs, CA. I am very excited to see my family and friends. It feels good going back to my roots sober and clear minded. Other healing trip for me! I love walking down the same streets in a new character, A new me, A better me. A stronger me.

I am grateful for life, for my clear mind, my family, and for Sober is the New Black

 

Stay connect with love, Adolfo

This photo is my 4am at work face

4am sober face

4am sober face